Are Reverse Kegels The Silver Bullet to ending Premature Ejaculation?
If you have been doing your research on lasting longer in bed, you may have encountered the terms kegels and even PC muscles. You may have even heard of kegel and reverse kegel exercises that involve the muscles of the abdominal floor and how these exercises are intended to make you last longer in bed. Experts, doctors, and even ordinary people all rate these exercises as the be all, end all of the sexual wellness.
So, what is all the fuss about anyway? Read on as I dissect the topic of kegel exercises, whereby the focus will be on reverse kegels. At the end of it, you will understand what they are, how you can do them, and how beneficial they are to you. First, let’s get familiar with the human body on a basic level (specifically the pelvic floor where all the action happens):
The Pelvic Floor
The pelvic floor is a set of muscles that run from your tailbone to the pubic bone. It is the part between your legs that plays a vital part in your bodily functions. If the muscle is weak, you will suffer from incontinence, frequent urination, premature ejaculation, and a slew of other complications.
There are many exercises that people do in order to strengthen this set of muscles but sometimes, misinformation and doing them incorrectly actually renders these exercises counterproductive. There are two main muscles in the pelvic floor:
- The Bulbocavernous Muscle, also commonly known as the BC Muscle which you can flex when you try to stop urine mid-flow.
- The Ischiocavernosus Muscle, also commonly known as the IC Muscle which you can feel when you try to fart.
These two muscles play a role in your ability to control your ejaculation and urination. Therefore, exercises that strengthen them will benefit you in more ways than simply lasting longer in bed.
Reverse Kegels vs Kegels
There are two kinds of Kegel exercises that you can do to strengthen your muscles in the lower abdominal region:
- Reverse Kegels
Both of them are meant to improve the strength of the pelvic muscles. If these muscles get stronger, the inherent benefits include:
- Stronger and more intense orgasms
- Better core strength when done along with other core strengthening exercises
- Better Erections
- Curing incontinence
- Better stability of the spine and hips
- And for your wife or girlfriend, a tighter vagina (big incentive for you to get her on board with this)
Kegel exercises are more common than reverse kegels and you are more likely to have stumbled upon the former. In fact, they are so common that for the sake of our article here, I will be referring to them as “normal kegels” or “regular Kegels”. They are different but target the same muscles.
Since this is not a science journal, an intuitive understanding rather than a purely scientific explanation of the differences between regular kegels and reverse kegels will better serve our purpose.
Normal kegels are exercises that strengthen your BC/PC muscles. When you do these exercises, you will increase the intensity of your orgasms and at an advanced level, you can even stop ejaculation entirely and have dry orgasms. Reverse kegels, on the other hand, relax the BC/PC muscles and strengthen the IC muscles. They also balance out the effects of overdoing normal kegel exercises. Before you get startled, yes, you can overdo normal kegels. This usually leads to a tighter pelvic floor that may worsen your PE problem.
I realized that starting to learn how to do reverse kegels properly then moving on to regular kegels was more beneficial to me. After consulting a physician, I was told that my pelvic floor muscles were too tight and, therefore, doing reverse kegels first made sense because it helped relax them before even trying to do the regular kegels. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to do it that way because our bodies and preferences are different. I also realized that Reverse kegels are more difficult to master but once you put them down to pat, your path to lasting longer in bed will be much easier.
Some people say that either of the two is better than the other; however, according to my research and experience, they tend to complement each other. Think of it this way: when you go to the gym, you don’t just work on your biceps and neglect the triceps; you work on both of them, right? (Probably not the best analogy but you catch my drift)
To sum it up, the importance of doing reverse kegels cannot be overstated. You are highly recommended to alternate them with normal kegels to realize maximum benefits.
How To Do Reverse Kegels (A Step by Step Guide)
If you have ever done the normal kegels, the muscles that you are to target with the reverse kegels are the same. If you are doing this for the very first time, however, it can be a bit tough to isolate the right muscle from the very beginning. I don’t expect you to nail the whole process on your first try. Take time to practice and you will get better. For the sake of this guide, my presumption is that you are a total newbie. If you are more advanced with the normal kegels, you can skip some steps.
With that out of the way, follow this process to learn how to do reverse kegels correctly:
Step 1: Identify the correct muscle
While you are peeing, try to force the urine out faster. As you do that, now try to stop the urine altogether as you pass it (Notice how it almost feels impossible). The muscle that is involved in both exercises is the BC muscle. It is the one involved with the kegel exercises:
- Trying to pee faster is the equivalent of a reverse kegel
- Trying to stop the urine is equivalent to the regular kegel.
Step 2: Calm yourself and start working on the muscles
Move to a calm environment that is free of distractions. Close the curtains and dim the lights. Sit comfortably in a chair or lie on your bed facing up. Breathe deeply to relax your body completely. Now, try to simulate the sensation of farting or forcing yourself to pee faster.
Step 3: Take Deep Breaths
Stop contracting the muscles and take really deep breaths that expand and contract your stomach. This is what we refer to as breathing using the diaphragm because it goes beyond the normal breathing techniques that focus solely on the chest area.
Step 4: Do them together
Do the farting and peeing muscle actions together with the deep breathing exercise. Also, try to contract your stomach muscles a bit while you do the whole exercise.
Step 5: Isolate the muscular movements
Once you have started to feel the muscles after doing some repetitions of the exercise, the next step is to learn to do reverse kegels without contracting the stomach and deep breathing. This is genuinely the hardest part of the exercise. There is no easier way to say it other than this: take a mental journey of your body. Visualize the muscles of the pelvic floor relaxing and contracting. If you meditate, this part is going to be much easier as it was for me (I do meditate).
This step is all about learning to intuitively single out the BC/PC muscles. Once you master this, increase the number of reps each day.
Step 6: Test drive
Since you have nailed the process of doing reverse kegels, you can now put your shiny, newly acquired skills to the test. Can your newly strengthened BC and IC muscles help you to last longer in bed? A good way to train yourself is to use the muscles during masturbation or with a sex toy such as the Kiiroo Onyx 2 or the Fleshlight Launch. From my own experience (using both sex toys), I noticed a few things:
- Reverse Kegels enables you to relax and lessen the arousal when you are about to reach the point of no return.
- Rather than stopping ejaculation through brute force (squeezing the muscles hard), reverse kegels go about it in a relaxed and natural way. During the initial weeks of trying these exercises, sometimes the arousal levels got out of hand and accidents happened. Actually, accidents happened far more frequently than I care to admit but I am not that fast of a learner anyways. With time, as I practiced more and more with the sex toys, I was able to control my arousal levels with more certainty.
- If you use the reverse kegels with normal kegels, you can last much longer. I had trained myself to do the traditional kegels as well.
Several weeks of solo training will prime you for the ultimate challenge: Doing reverse kegels during sex.
Step 7: Reverse Kegels during Sex
Doing reverse kegels with a partner is the hardest part, as I realized. It is tough because there is a lot of stimulation going on at the same time. You have visual stimulation, she is touching you, she is making arousing feminine sounds, and the vagina feels more natural than your hand or sex toy.
This is a far cry from the tranquility of the dim-lit room you have during solo training. Keeping your wits about you and executing the exercises is going to be tough. Personally, I lost focus at the beginning and to be honest, it takes some getting used to.
To help you relax, take deep breaths and move things slowly, to begin with. It is much easier to do this when you are the one dictating the pace, beginning with foreplay. Experiment with a few positions to find the one that you are most comfortable with. Personally, with her on top, I was able to focus on my breathing and muscular contractions better. In addition to that, I used my glutes to press against her with my hips. I avoided using my abs since using them makes it harder to engage the PC muscles effectively.
Why Should You Do Reverse Kegels
Reverse Kegels are important because they train you to relax your PC/BC muscle. Arousal and ejaculation are usually a result of the PC/BC muscles tightening up. When you are having a sexual encounter, the PC/BC muscles are usually contracting and they help you to reach orgasm.
Let’s assume that we have an arousal scale that runs from 0 to 10, with zero being neutral and 10 being an orgasm. The progressive tightening of these muscles pushes you along the scale from zero, when you get an erection, to 8-10, the point of no return. Reverse kegels, by relaxing these muscles, cause the arousal to drop a notch or two along the scale to maybe a 6 when you are getting to 8 allowing you to last longer.
Now, if you do the regular kegel exercises, you strengthen the muscles over time as they continue to stretch. Looking back at our scale, these exercises accelerate you along this scale during sex. They allow you to squeeze these muscles hard enough when you reach 9-10, and if you are advanced enough, to have orgasms without ejaculating. Sounds good, right? Well, if you overdo these kegel exercises on their own, you can actually have premature ejaculation because the overstretching increases the chances of accidental failure. With time, the muscles give in more regularly and you end up where you started.
That’s why it is important to have reverse kegel exercises so that you can use them to slow you down along the scale and then use the normal kegels to stop yourself from ejaculating when you are at the point of no return.
Let’s quantify the benefits of reverse kegels:
- They help you to stay calm and in control during sex so that you can last longer.
- They actively stop you from ejaculating quickly. Be wary though, as this only works before you are so far along the arousal scale. If you allow yourself to reach the point of no return, only regular kegels can save you.
- They help you strike a balance with the Pelvic Floor muscle growth if you are already doing normal kegels.
- These exercises are great for guys who have erectile dysfunction. They get harder erections if they train their PC/BC muscles regularly.
- These exercises are ideal for men who are recuperating from any procedures done in the pelvic area.
- They are useful if you have a problem with incontinence. When the muscles get stronger, you are less likely to “leak” any urine when you don’t want to.
- As a bonus, if you do these exercises with your partner, not only will your bond grow stronger but also she will get a tighter vagina (Cheers to that).
- You can use them during foreplay (especially if you have not had sex for a long time). If you have been on a dry spell, you are likely to get over-excited at the slightest of touches from your partner. At this juncture, you can use reverse kegels to slow down to avoid ejaculating before you even get to the sex.